When I changed my major from computer science to journalism, my parents and everyone else warned me that it may not have been the most financially sound decision. As much as I hate to admit it, they were right.
A career in multimedia storytelling, specifically magazines, was a decision I made at the tender age of 11. Unfortunately, by the time I was old enough to be taken seriously, technology was advancing, print journalism was indeed dying, and people weren’t buying magazines or print anything anymore. In other words, my plan (the way I saw it) was ruined and there was a good chance that after graduation, I might still be broke and struggling to find work…for a while.
The odds were definitely against me, but at the time, stubborn me did not care. I was young, passionate and motivated, not by money, but by the thought of finally committing to something I actually loved. If that meant me living in some tiny apartment (or back home because economy sucks) eating jelly sandwiches for dinner until I got a big writing break after college, I was in.
3 years later on graduation day, I was just as happy as anyone else graduating, even with my underrated Liberal Arts degree. In that moment, it never dawned on me that in just a few months, plans would defer, I would be jobless, carless, still broke and slightly resentful about my decision. In that moment, I and everyone else around was super proud of me and the 120+ hours it took to get there. I got a degree. Yay.
Life’s great when you’re on an accomplishment high.
…but when you come down and everyone’s done temporarily celebrating you, it can be a low…if you let it be. College felt like one big 4 year party/main event, then everyone went back home. Friends and associates moved, got jobs or into some prestige post-grad internship or Master’s program. Then came the engagements, pregnancies, and every other super amazing accomplishment online I felt genuinely happy about but ones that also left me questioning, “am I doing something wrong here?” because I followed the exact same manual for success.
And because the internet, a world where showcasing the best parts of our lives while disguising our not-so-happy ones is normal, the whole thing took a dramatic toll on my mental. I only talk about it because I know I’m not at all the only one who deals with post-grad blues.
It’s mostly because after you graduate high school or college, there are no longer any performance measures that let you know if you’ve moved on to the next grade/level or not. You kind of have to figure that out for yourself now and deal with what schools should have been telling us this entire time: No one learns the same, lives the same, or defines success the same.
In light of this whole experience, I’ll leave you with 5 reasons why you should never let society, people, and especially the internet rush or define you or your process.
You don’t even realize how amazing your life looks online too.
Despite your crucial setbacks and life lows, there are people who think your life is amazing because it is. Sometimes, it has nothing to even do with where you are or what you’re doing. Your personality, your aura, and life is just lit. You just think it’s not because you’re living inside of you and you’re not where ego tells you you should be. You have just as much right as everyone else to snap and chat, even if it’s not in Dubai or wherever. Happiness is contagious. A smile is a smile, and wherever you are, it can make you feel a lot better than a frown. Plus, by recognizing how amazing your life actually is, you’ll attract some more amazement. ^_^
Life is a freakin’ marathon, not a race.
Just when you think you’ve accomplished one thing you thought would make you the most proud or happiest, you’re thinking about the next thing that you think would give you that same temporary feeling. It’s like going nowhere fast. We’ve done it time and time again with school, competitions, or leveling up in the ranks of whatever hierarchy. Letting accomplishments fuel your happiness will leave you searching for something that should already exist inside of you. Bask in the process of each moment of your becoming. Find a reason to celebrate yourself each day. You made it through another 24 hours in this crazy world, you’re worth a toast!
You’ll waste time obsessing over something that will eventually work itself out.
You’re online. You scroll. You see “such and such” just did this and that. You’re still online, wondering when your life will be different. *Breaking News: It will be different when you get offline. I love our generation, but we spend way too much time in our heads, on our phones, or both. We complain and think about what the world should look like instead of creating that world. I’m our biggest advocate, but don’t think I was going to let us slide. It’s time to start holding ourselves more accountable if we want to be better, right? Right.
You’ll be doing it for other people instead of yourself.
The motivation and desire to succeed will never be enough to get you where you think you should be if you don’t find a legit reason to do it. Forget society, your friends, parents, or whoever else has this expectation of you and what you should or should not be doing. Get really introspective about what you want out of your life and don’t waste time living it for others. I mean, it is your life. Plus, if you’re doing it because you really love it, you’ll love the process that much more.
Timing is everything. Day by day, little by little, a little becomes a lot. Slow and steady wins the race.
All of which are three of my favorite quotes and phrases because they each remind me that in such a fast paced world, it’s OK for me to be diligent. And because I’m not doing it for other people, I’m not on anyone else’s time. Instead of sending yourself into a mental crisis, thinking about how far away from your next goal you are, commit to doing something each day that will bring you closer to it. That way, you’ll feel like you accomplished something when you’ve reached the end of your day versus getting all anxious about it. To take from one of my favorite brands, just do it. The thoughts you have about your dream are no coincidence. If you do it, it will happen anyway.
That’s all. Thanks always, for reading my words. Like, comment, and most importantly, share this with someone you think could use it! Until next time, peace and love to you and your journey.